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Divine Culinary Broadcaster – 0036 – The Simplest Dish

Chapter 36: The Simplest Dish

Author: Black Lantern (黑色花灯)

Translated by Gumihou


At 12:10 pm, Ye Fei finally received the notification from DCB System to begin his broadcast.

Actually, there were already plenty of people loitering about on the channel. Naturally, these were all foodies and there were plenty of familiar names here.

As the only person with the special privilege to speak directly to Ye Fei over the mike, Tasting Everything Under Heaven was nearly incoherent with excitement.

When Ye Fei finally stood up and made his way to the kitchen, Tasting Everything Under Heaven shouted, “Deity Ye, what are you making today, ah?”

Ye Fei shook his head, “Don’t know yet.”

Tasting Everything Under Heaven, “… f*ck, you’re still not going to reveal anything even now? Looks like we’re going to receive a surprise again. I look forward to Deity Ye’s performance. Don’t worry, I’m all

prepared to give all the gifts.”

Just then, local tyrant I Am a Foodie put up a message, “Today, I have prepared a budget of HX¥100,000. Deity Ye, don’t let me down.”

All chatter within the channel forum disappeared in the wake of I Am a Foodie’s message. Exactly 3 seconds later, chaos exploded again.

“F*ck, you’ve prepared 100,000?!”

“Your mom, Foodie Bro, local tyrant! You’re a supreme local tyrant, ah. My god in heaven, you’re so generous, ah”

“Foodie Bro, can I hug your thigh? What do you do? Can I clean your toilets? Rest assured, I shall never reveal what type of toilet paper you use.”

“Today’s live broadcast is really going to reach the heavens. The show hasn’t even started yet but someone is already prepared to bestow HX¥100,000, ah. Isn’t this something like a m*therf*cking myth?”

Tao Tie’s username lit up as he sent up a bitterly smiling emoji. “Foodie Bro, please don’t hit me. I’ve only prepared HX¥50,000. Don’t laugh, ah.”

Everyone else, “… …”


Your sis, just what day is today, ah? Yell out ‘local tyrant’ and two of them jumped out. The one prepared to give out HX¥50,000 felt ashamed? That kind of money is something that even Silver Star Deities dare not think about, ah. This newcomer Ye Fei, a newly promoted Bronze Star Rank 2 broadcaster is so loved by his fans, what a blow to other broadcasters, ah.

After looking at the messages from I Am a Foodie and Tao Tie, Tasting Everything Under Heave smiled into his microphone and said, “Brothers, looks like you guys are true foodies, ah. For the sake of delicious food, you treated gold like mud. Still, I like this attitude. This is the mark of a true foodie. I have not prepared much today. I run a small business and can’t be compared to local tyrants. A modest HX¥80,000 only.” After that, he addressed Ye Fei, “Deity Ye, please don’t disdain me for preparing too little, ah.”

Ye Fei, “… …”

Your mom, this is ‘preparing too little’? If I disdain you for this, wouldn’t other broadcasters form a mob and destroy me?

“That’s fine,” Ye Fei was brimming with excitement, but somehow managed to remain calm on the surface. After all, with so many fans watching him, he can’t show his greed for money too openly, right?

“I’m happy that so many people are here to support me, Ye Fei. I won’t waste your time with any more nonsense. Let’s start the live broadcast!”

With that, Ye Fei entered the kitchen. Just like the previous two times, although Ye Fei had made some mental preparations, he was still curious about what kind of ingredients System would give him.

He crouched down and opened the storage box. When he

spotted the ingredients of the day, his eyes lit up. There were two different ingredients inside the box – tomatoes and eggs.

Two extremely common ingredients that Ye Fei also liked

very much. That’s because he often made Scrambled Eggs with Tomatoes for himself. He was actually quite proficient with home-cooked dishes, Scrambled Eggs with Tomatoes being one of them.

“Do you want me to make Scrambled Eggs with Tomatoes?” muttered Ye Fei as he took out the ingredients.

DCB System’s voice said, “Scrambled Eggs with Tomatoes is a Level 1 Limited Delicacy. Though it is easy to make, it is a difficult dish to master. Since eggs would emit fragrance when fried, the Host should activate the Ten Thousand Mile Fragrance Skill here.”

Ye Fei thought that this was sound advice. When using real locally farmed chicken eggs, even with regular blended peanut oil, eggs could be very fragrant when fried.

“Then, I’ll make Scrambled Eggs with Tomatoes. By the way, is there anything special about these eggs and tomatoes?”

Ye Fei has caught on to the fact that ingredients provided by the System were no ordinary things at all. The single tomato was large, red and shone with a natural lustre. It did not look like it had been waxed like most soft perishables fruits and vegetables to preserve their appearance. It should at least be some kind of organically grown and collected food.

The eggs, two of them, were also very large. Their white shells were shiny and glossy looking. A single glance was enough to tell that these were no ordinary eggs.

Sure enough, DCB System said, “The origin of the eggs and tomatoes have been integrated into the Host’s memories. Skills to make Scrambled Eggs with Tomatoes have also been loaded up.”

“Right, now it’s up to me.”

At that, Ye Fei placed both eggs and tomato on the table. He took out a white ceramic pot and a white ceramic bowl from the other storage box.

When everyone saw the large and round tomato as well as

the two white eggs from the storage box, they immediately guessed what Ye Fei was about to make.

“Yi~~ Is Deity Ye going to make Scrambled Eggs with Tomatoes today?”

“This dish… is too common. There’s nothing unique about it.”

“That’s true, ah. It’s so simple that anyone with an ounce of skill could make it.”

“Deity Ye, we strongly request a different dish. Scrambled Eggs with Tomatoes is too ordinary.”

“Aiyo, if I had known that today’s dish is Scrambled Eggs with Tomatoes, I wouldn’t have come. I never liked eggs even as a child.”

“I don’t eat tomatoes,”

While everyone was chattering to each other about the matter, I Am a Foodie sent up a message. “Everyone, have you already forgotten

Deity Ye’s signature move? The ingredients he used have never been anything but top quality. Since he had decided to make Scrambled Eggs with Tomatoes, I suspect the origins of those eggs and that tomato can’t be simple, right?”

Tasting Everything Under Heaven also chimed up, “The tomato is large, round and the colour perfect with no evidence of a waxy surface to impede the natural lustre on its skin. Regardless of its origin, it’s definitely the best of its kind. As for the eggs, they are large, white

with not a single flaw on shells that are so thin and fine that I could see the yolks inside. No doubt, this is a super high-grade egg.”

Tasting Everything Under Heaven’s eloquent description was spoken through the mike and was thus heard by everyone in the channel.

Where, at first, everyone had disdained the simple ingredients, but after his explanation, they paid better attention to the tomato and eggs

and had to admit that Ye Fei’s ingredients definitely did not look ordinary.

Ye Fe smiled at Tasting Everything Under Heaven’s words and said, “Brother, you’re right. For today’s Scrambled Eggs with Tomatoes, I

shall be using wild tomatoes from the Golden River Plains. [1] For those who are familiar with the Golden River Plains, you should know the peculiarity of this area. The soil is rich with organic matter with a PH value of 7. That’s neutral, you know? The annual temperature here is a stable 20 to 25 degrees Celsius with soil humidity of 75% and air humidity between 45 to 50%. These are the best conditions for tomatoes to grow. Only in the Golden River Plains that wild tomatoes could grow well in such a harsh location and yet still be better looking and have much higher nutrient content than normal tomatoes.”

The moment Ye Fei finished speaking, a luxury plane nyoomed across the screen.

There was no need to check who the person responsible for this plane was. It could only be the eccentric and brash local tyrant, I Am a Foodie.

Sure enough, after throwing out a plane, I Am a Foodie said, “I once saw this information in a food magazine. According to the article, they say that Golden River Plain is indeed the most suitable place to grow tomatoes. If you can get your hands on tomatoes, moreover, wild-growing tomatoes from this mecca or tomatoes, presenting a plane is only respectful.”

With connoisseurs started throwing rewards, the people below naturally refused to be left behind. Although not many of them know where the Golden River Plains was, after hearing Ye Fei and I Am a Foodie’s incredible exposition and seeing the plane gifted by I Am a Foodie zooming across the screen, they felt they had to extend some reward too.

Ye Fei had no idea that I Am a Foodie as well as a group of viewers had already started showering him with gifts. After all, none of these people was equipped with mikes and their loud exclamations were limited to all caps and exclamations marks only.

After introducing the tomato, Ye Fei picked up the egg and said, “This egg is from the Red-tail Chicken of the foothills of the Southern Cangshan region.”


Only the loud exclamation from Tasting Everything Under Heaven was heard, but in fact, I Am a Foodie was also shocked. Hearing Tasting Everything Under Heaven’s exclamation, Ye Fei smiled and said, “Looks like Tasting Heaven Bro knows about this egg. Why don’t you help me introduce it?”

Tasting Everything Under Heaven was so excited that he was nearly incoherent. “I- I- I say, I say, e-enough talk. I will talk, you guys listen.”

Viewers from the channel nearly fainted with anger. Hey, in this space, only you and Deity Ye could be heard, you know? Even if we want to talk, it’s not like anyone could hear us!


[Gumihou: Lol, I’m invested too.]


[1] Golden River Plains – this place does not exist As for ‘wild tomatoes’ being ‘large, round and perfect…’

Gumihou: …that’s some incredible marketing hype. Wild tomatoes are tiny, and more like cherry tomatoes.

PH value of 7 for soil is… impossible for a place ‘rich with organic matter’. This is basically a skinny full cream black latte kind of soil.

This fantasy ingredient is full of bs.

However, Gumihou doesn’t hate it. It’s fake, but it’s so clearly fake and doesn’t take itself seriously that Gumi is more amused than angry.


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This Post Has 8 Comments

  1. Abastika


  2. Hamster

    Wild tomatoes from chinese “golden river” flood plains I do not want because chinese rivers are polluted. In many parts of China, unless crops are grown in greenhouses watered with filtered osmosis water, they are not qualified to be “Certified Organic”. The majority of ground water and ground water wells are also polluted, so the water needs to be treated before it can be used to raise organic crops. The tomatoes and chickens should be raised without hormones. China is the biggest source of crop growing hormones. I remember seeing this video of chinese “organic” farms where bottles of hormones were poured into the ditch water irrigating the crops.
    URL: www {DOT}

  3. Hamster

    One way to make an omelet with a crispy wrap design:
    URL: youtu {DOT} be/9tP2k84xboM

    1. Gumihou

      Ahhh, I want to try making crepes one day

  4. Reader

    At lease with this novel the cooking makes more sense.

    1. Gumihou

      It also don’t take itself seriously, so all the ‘wrong facts’ are more funny than annoying.

  5. Reader

    Well now I am thinking of scrambled eggs and tomatoes for Dinner. Not the mythical tomatoes and eggs mind you. Just backyard eggs and regular tomatoes.

    Thanks for translating!

    1. Gumihou

      I made some, hehe. It’s yummy, I don’t need weird ingredients for this.

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