Chapter 93 Crab Meat Lion Head (a)
Translated by Gumihou
Edited by Gumihou
As everyone knows, Chinese New Year is around the corner!
With Chinese New Year here, Gumihou will soon be tasked with a lot of cooking. Steamed chicken, chicken rice, steamed fish, ingot shaped dumplings and more! There’s also prawn chips, fried peanuts, fried onions and fried cashew nuts to make too…
Since it’s unlikely that Gumihou would be able to find time to translated on Wed, Thu and Fri, maybe even Sat please have this chapter now~
Everyone, please have a Happy Chinese New Year!
It was late and the night was dark.
It was not completely still, however, as Shiyu was busy trying to improve her Peacock Fish. This fifth dish, a steamed fish dish, had gotten her stuck for a long time now. Steamed too long and the fish became hard and overcooked. A too-short steaming time would result in undercooked fish. She had planned to consult some of the professional chefs back at the Imperial Capital on fish steaming techniques. She had gotten to know a few after they had patronised her little stall to check out her innovative cooking. However, something or other had always interrupted her plans and she never got around to asking them.
Instead of waiting to return to the Capital for the consult, she might as well use the time to experiment first.
It was quite easy to get hold of the necessary equipment to make steamed fish. She has both steamer and a miniature stove. As for fish, she could catch as many as she liked from the stream. For the moment, the only thing she focused on was getting the texture right. In other words, the perfect steaming time . To do this, Shiyu had opted to not use any condiments or seasoning but focussed only on scaling, cutting and steaming the fish, over and over again.
She continued on until the stars disappeared and the sky began to lighten up. The campfire was nothing but  ash now.
Just then Wen Xian came out. He rubbed his eyes and blinked, “Sister Shi, have you been here all night?”
“All night? Is it dawn already?” Shiyu looked up and had to squint at the brightening sky.
“Sister Shi, can you tell me what is it like to have a family?” Wen Xian suddenly asked. At Shiyu’s curious look, he continued, “My parents once told me that I was adopted. When they passed on, I was all alone in this world. However, last night the Grandpa Trees told me that I have an older brother. They say he would come and take me home one day.”
“A brother?” she had already guessed that Wen Xian’s background must be quite amazing, but a mysterious brother? Could it be one of the characters she knew? “What’s his name? Did the Grandpa Trees tell you?”
“They said his surname is Wen, like mine, and that his given name is Heng. Wen Heng.”
Oh, well if they are brothers, of course, the surname should be the same, but Wen Heng…
That Wen Heng!?
Shiyu suddenly jumped up and began to flail about in disbelief.
“You! Y-y-y-you…” you bigshot you!
In Shiyu’s eyes, Wen Xian had transformed from a guy with an interesting ability into a giant glittering golden thigh!
Weng Heng, ah, Wen Heng! Naturally, when Fat Onion wrote her counter novel against Dog Two’s stallion novel, she went the opposite direction of installing a reverse harem. No, rather than a reverse harem, it was a harem of male beauties!
If Lin Fan is the Ultimate Male Lead for male writer Dog Two, the Ultimate Female Lead female writer Fat Onion had crafted to counter him was Xuan Yin! Like Lin Fan, she has a throng of beauties in her Inner Court.
Xuan Yin practices a type of skill called the Charming Arts. Like Shiyu’s master, this skill could drastically increase one’s power. However, instead literally devouring a person or creature and absorbing their power. The Charming Arts required the practitioner to enter into Duel Cultivation in order to increase one’s Cultivation Base.
Before encountering Wen Heng, Xuan Yin had already established a good power base for herself and her harem of male beauties were living in harmony. When Wen Heng fell for Xuan Yin, he was determined to be her sole lover and began to kill off her harem one by one. Of course, since Xuan Yin liked everyone equally, how could she bear to have him kill off her adorable beauties? In the end, she had no choice, but to threaten his life. To stay in her good books, Wen Heng had compromise and promised to leave the harem alone.
However, please don’t think that just because he doted upon the FL Xuan Yin that this Wen Heng guy is a tender, kind-hearted sort. While it is true that he is an elegant beauty whose face could rival even among the top ten in terms of looks, his cruelty was just as proportionately high. To cite one example: When he found out that Xuan Yin’s sect had treated her poorly, he stormed the place and killed everyone. Man, woman and child. Even the servants were not spared.
Moreover, while he had promised Xuan Yin that ‘he would not harm those in her inner court’, the promise only applied to himself and not the scores of subordinates he had going after them. If the male beauties in Xuan Yin’s harem had not been great talents in possession of some small halo themselves, they would have died several times over.
Later, when the Human Race was locked in a battle against the Hundred Races of the Heavens, Wen Heng died saving Xuan Yin. In some twisted way, the Xuan Yin’s harem of men was saved too, but no one was really clear if Xuan Yin regretted losing this gloriously cruel and elegant beauty.
Regardless of what might happen in the future, Wen Heng is definitely the shiniest golden thigh that Shiyu had come across thus far. Aside from his own incredible strength, he has millions of subordinates under his command. Befriending him would definitely be the right choice.
Wen Xian squinted at Shiyu’s elated face, “Sister Shi, do you know my brother? What kind of person is he?”
“How should I say it, ah…” Shiyu thought for a moment before settling on. “Formidable strength, values love and loves righteousness.”
Wen Xian’s eyes brightened, “Really? That’s so incredible! Wait, compared to Bother Lin Fan, who is stronger?” the strongest person he could count as a personal acquaintance thus far was Lin Fan.
“Of course, your brother, ah.”
“Then, how about the number one fighter in our College?”
“Still your brother.”
“Then, what about Brother Feng Luo’s honourable grandfather?” Wen Xian tentatively asked.
“10 of Feng Luo’s grandfather can’t beat him, even 100 of them can’t beat your brother,” was Shiyu’s unhesitating reply.
“That’s too amazing!” Wen Xian was like a little child with his sparkling eyes. He felt that Sister Shi might be exaggerating (a lot), but he could not help feeling honoured and amazed to be related to such an incredible powerhouse.
I want to see my brother soon, ah!
Inside the cave, Lin Fan and Feng Luo’s eyes popped open. They turned and caught each other’s eyes. One question flashed in their heads. ‘Who is this Wen Heng?’
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After their party had breakfasted and packed up, they continued on their journey.
At this very moment, several tens of thousand miles away from the Eastern Empire lies the Yun Xiao Sect. Somewhere within its vast compounds was an abandoned building. Within this abandoned building laid a miserably looking girl.
 The girl was thin, haggard and covered in bruises. There were scratches on her face and some of the bruises there were already turning yellow, indicating long term abuse. The girl had been lying there unconscious for days now, but suddenly, on the very day that the void was ripped open, the girl opened her eyes.
Contrary to her miserable looks, her eyes were very bright as they stared curiously around this unfamiliar world. The girl gazed down at herself, examined her clothes before looking up at the water-stained ceiling blankly, “Where am I?”
Summoning what little strength she has, she crawled to the doorway and peered out. From there, she saw the grey cobbled stones of ancient streets, the white walls and colourful roofs of ancient buildings. Except, these buildings did not look old. Also, now and then young women in flowing ancient style dresses passed her by.
 Was she in an ancient drama TV set? One of those specially made towns meant for filmmaking?
 However, a glance beyond the buildings showed nothing but more of the ancient slanting roofs, as well as misty mountains and rolling hills. Not a single plane had flown across their heads. None of the girls was carrying phones.
“Have I… transmigrated?” she whispered to herself, disbelief thick in her voice.
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It took three days for Shiyu’s party to reach the location that San Pang had mentioned.
The area was located deep within a valley. Green hills rose from all sides, forming a natural defence and there was only one way to get in by land. Because the valley was considered lowland, the microclimate within it was very stable and pleasant. It was cool without being too cold. Also, perhaps due to its bowl shape, the valley was saturated with Spiritual Energy. A small river wind through the valley, fed by two streams. The ground was covered in a lush carpet of grass that waved gently in the breeze. Here and there grew rare plants and exotic herbs of some undetermined age.
“This is practically a paradise!” Shiyu exclaimed. “If everyone could move here, they could be completely self-sufficient.”
“It certainly is beautiful,” Wen Xian said. “If uncles and your grandpa move here, the Grandpa Trees said they’d help look after them too.”
With Wen Xian’s assurance, it was decided.
“I thank you in advance. In the future, if you ever need any help, just come to me. As long as I, Lin Fan, can do it, I shall consider it my duty!”
“Me too!” Shiyu chimed in.
This kindness was like rescuing one’s entire family. How does one repay this kind of favour?
Wen Xian smiled awkwardly, “You’ve all been very good to me. It’s only right for me to help you.”
Little Wen Xian is so pure, Shiyu thought as her heart squeezed at this child-like generosity. Perhaps, if Wen Heng has someone like Wen Xian by his side, he would not be so overbearing in the future.
 “Hey! What about me?!” a little voice piped up. The little guy, their valuable guide that showed them this paradise was very angry at being neglected.
 Shiyu and Lin Fan immediately heaped praises on San Pang, with Shiyu promising to cook him something delicious with good medicinal herbs in it.
“I guess the next thing we should do is go back and persuade the family to move here,” said Shiyu. With the more potent Spiritual Energy in the air, perhaps Grandpa would recover faster and be much healthier in the future.
The party stayed the night in the valley.
The next day, they explored the valley again. Then, they ventured a little further into the forest beyond the valley. Though they spotted some high-level spiritual beasts, all five of them decided to retreat. Their strength was pitifully low now. It’s better to Cultivate first before going after this next challenge.
The return trip happened much faster.
A few days later, they were back at Qing Shan City. However, unlike the time when they departed, the atmosphere at the Lin Clan seemed shrouded under a mist of gloom.
[Gumihou: Uhhh, who dat? Who dat?]
Perfect Steaming Time: This is kind of a weird problem to focus on, considering that the issue was ‘It tasted bad’. Also, unlike French pastry or thin crispy cookies where a 30 second difference could mean the difference between golden brown and dark brown, a 600g fish takes maybe 8 to 10 minutes. 20% leeway in cooking is a lot. Not to mention you might also want to take the fish out midway to throw the ‘fish water’ away to reduce the chances of fishiness and use this opportunity to pour some special sauce over the fish and steam for a further minute or two.
In other words, Shiyu is chasing after a futile quest. Especially since she is catching her fish from random streams. Sure, you could argue that she only uses similar-looking fish but the author also seemed to have forgotten that Peacock Fish requires a fairly flat fish. Freshwater fish tend not to grow flat and wide but long and round. So, it’s not
easy to get the properly shaped fish for her specific purpose.
Gumihou looks pityingly at Shiyu. Then, sighs sadly at wasted fish life.
 Correcting the Odd Wrong Fact: Shiyu said ‘black ash’ here. This is how I know the author has no experience with wood fire cooking. Wood ash is white. Whatever black thing you see is soot. I have absolutely no regrets putting in the corrections for the Chargrilled Rabbit, which isn’t really Chargrilled but Spiritual Fire Grilled, but whatever.
 Additional Information for Dramatic Purpose: It’s the grand entrance of a great ‘possibly’ enemy. So I thought it needed a little more pizzaz!
 Additional Information for Realistic Characters: San Pang did not say anything at all when the others were heaping praises at Wen Xian. Which strikes me as… very, very unlikely.
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