Chapter 237: Buddha Jumps over the Wall
Translated by Gumihou
Edited by Onionpi
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Su Nuan Nuan sighed gustily, then said to Chu Xiu, “At least we women still have some self-control left. Really, those men are an embarrassment to society. At least sister still knows the difference between being full and hungry…”
She was still speaking when she noticed Chu Xiu’s face turning red. Just then, Long Pingzhang hurried in, his arms tucked under his protruding stomach in an attempt to support the extra weight. Looking a lot like a pregnant woman with her belly full of joy. He was gasping for breath as he said, “Xiu’er, why… why are you still here? I know that you’ve also had quite a lot to eat, ah. Come… come and jog with me, otherwise you’ll burst open. Don’t bother about whatever feminine air anymore, this is a life or death situation, ah.”
Chu Xiu raised her head, revealing a tearful face, “It’s all Brother A-Niu’s fault. Because you keep snatching food for me, I ended up eating a lot and a lot. Now I can’t even stand up, and you just ran away and abandoned me…”
“It’s alright, it’s alright, aren’t I here now? Come on, come on, I’ll help you up.” As he spoke, Long Pingzhang wobbled over to help Chu Xiu out of her seat, and together, they shuffled out of the room, supporting their stomachs and each other on the way.
Su Nuan Nuan, “… …”
“What kind of consequence is this? Looks like I really have to be more careful about my recipe choices in the future. The younger people might still be alright, but older people like old madam might actually eat themselves to death, ah. Not to mention old ladies like her won’t be able to jog around to digest the food. Why, I might end up as the unfilial granddaughter-in-law who deliberately overfed her grandmother-in-law to death!”
Su Nuan Nuan shook her head wordlessly. Then, she picked up a pair of clean chopsticks and began fishing out the remaining delicacies in the jar. Next, she sat down, and began to carefully assess the fruits of her labour, “En, this pork belly is silky soft, fragrant but not greasy. Wu! This abalone is kind of tasteless now after having been stewed for so long. Ah, but the texture is not bad: Oh, oh, oh, this goat meat is really delicious, the flavour is really unique. This pigeon’s egg, hmm, after going through a long simmering, is actually quite fragrant…”
Finally, first madam gave her conclusion for this dish. “En, en, not bad. Even counting the time from the modern world, this jar of Buddha Jumps over the Wall is the best I’ve ever made. Perhaps it is all thanks to this hundred-year-old Shaoxing wine jar. Also, the ingredients here are all natural, organic and non-GMO. Everything tasted especially delicious and fragrant. Very good, once we’re back at the An Ping Residence, I must find a few 10 cattie wine jars and experiment. Hmm, more than a few would be needed. If I don’t prepare more… well, the people from the Main Palace and East Palace could still be kept away since they have to maintain their diets, but those shameless princes number two and four would probably storm into the mansion and squat there waiting to snatch my wine pots…”
About an hour passed before the joggers finally came filing in, all breathing harshly and doing their best to support each other. Su Nuan Nuan turned to sneer at the lot. “Well? Have you all properly digested your food? It’s not like I wish to deliberately find fault with you, but how old are you now? Why are you stuffing yourselves like children with sweet treats? Especially you two, the lord heir and a certain Third Rank Imperial Censor. Are you trying to make history by dying in the most stupid way?”
The people in front of her lowered their heads, unable to look her in the eye. Just when the silence was about to tip over into awkwardness, Manager Li showed his skill as a glib-tongued manager and solver of problems by holding two thumbs up, and said, “Earlier, madam said that this main dish alone will be enough to shake the foundations of Fu Sheng Xiang, at that time, this one had still been a little worried.
However, this one’s worry is all gone. In fact, is there even a need to make any other dishes? When the time of the competition comes, we can just bring up this huge wine jar and watch all those judges gorge themselves to death. I’m afraid when this dish comes out, not only Fu Sheng Xiang, even the entire Lin Qing, no, the whole world will be shaken up.”
“That’s too much of an exaggeration. The whole world is incredibly huge, you know. So, how could a mere jar of Buddha Jumps over the Wall be able to shake it?” Su Nuan Nuan laughed cheerfully at this flattery.
“Buddha Jumps over the Wall? Is that the name of this dish?” Long Pingzhang asked curiously.
“That’s right, ah. You’ve already eaten most of it, but still don’t know this dish’s name? Wu! Have I never mentioned it before?”
“No.” The people before her all shook their heads. This synchronised head shaking scene was spectacularly funny to Su Nuan Nuan, who was trying her best not to laugh out loud. Then, Duan Tingxuan said suspiciously, “Why is it called Buddha Jumps over the Wall? Isn’t the name a little too odd?”
Su Nuan Nuan laughed,
Once the seal is broken,
A heavenly scent burst forth,
And Buddha jumps over the wall.
For something that entices even the Buddha to jump over the wall to eat meat and fish of all things, don’t you agree that this dish has incredible attraction power?”
Long Pingzhang immediately cupped his hands in salute, “I see, that’s incredibly clever. My thanks for sister-in-law for this interesting explanation.”
Then, Li Qiushan said, “An Le Lou is actually quite far from the nearest Buddhist temple. Even if the smell of this dish could travel 10 li, it would still be quite difficult for it to reach the noses of the Buddhist masters there. However, we do have a Baiyun Temple just five li away from here, and I’m rather familiar with the Daoist priests there. How about calling it Daoist Priest Jumps over the Wall? This one feels that it’s more fitting.”
Fit your stupid head, ah. Daoist Priest Jumps over the Wall, in what way is that more fitting?
Su Nuan Nuan’s face turned into囧囧 at the weird name. Seeing Li Qiushan looking so proud of himself, she sniffed coldly, “That name is inappropriate. Everyone knows that the Buddhists are most famous for their ability to ‘endure’ against all kinds of temptations, but Daoist? Daoist believers are encouraged to follow their heart’s desires and do as they pleased. They’re famous for the religious philosophy of ‘Believe if You Will, Scram if You Won’t, & Don’t Block My Way to Heaven’. They may also eat meat, drink wine or marry if they wish to. Do you think a Daoist riest jumping over the wall has a greater impact than a Buddhist jumping over a wall for delicious food?” The Daoist practitioners in this era were mostly of the original sect, and therefore did not have many taboos, which was why Su Nuan Nuan dared to say this.
When she finished, Long Pingzhang and Duan Tingxuan clapped their hands and yelled ‘Good, good’, as though they were at an oratory competition.
“You’re absolutely right, the impact of Daoist Priest Jumps over the Wall is significantly lesser than Buddha Jumps over the Wall. Let’s all call it Buddha Jumps over the Wall. This is a most excellent name.” Duan Tingxuan grinned, “What Nuan Nuan said earlier is incredibly wonderful as well. ‘Believe if You Will, Scram if You Won’t, & Don’t Block My Way to Heaven’, how perfectly does this phrase portrays the Daoist principles?
Though there had been emperors who supported the Daoist school of thought, the Daoist priests themselves have never been concerned over the number of followers they have, unlike the Buddhists who went around preaching Buddhism and chanting here and there to anyone who would stand still to get more believers. Therefore, unless the imperial court were to interfere, there would probably always be more followers of Buddhist than Daoist.”
Su Nuan Nuan thought: That wonderful phrase actually came from some the internet and have nothing to do with me. Not that I can say that, haha. Instead, she smiled and said, “Regardless, I still like the freedom that Daoism gives to its followers. If I must have a religion, it would undoubtedly be Daoism.”
At this, the little marquis smirked, “That’s true… there is no way you would ever follow Buddhism, right? If nothing else, you would never be able to abstain from meat or fish. You’d probably return to your secular ways after three days of becoming a nun. Moreover, what temple would dare to take you? I’d be harassing them every day to get you back.”
“Sister, how do you make this dish? Can you teach me?”
Once all the joking and teasing was done, and Manager Li had left with Si Ping, Duan Tingxuan and Long Pingzhang were both determined to play a game of Go against each other to burn off some of their excess cheer. It was at this time that Chu Xiu timidly came up to Su Nuan Nuan to make this request.
At this, Duan Tingxuan’s ears perked up and he said, “What is that? Is Miss Chu planning to polish her good wife skills now? Let me tell you, you’re smart to use food as a way to win over the senior generations. My mother used to be really unhappy with Nuan Nuan, but now? After so many days of not seeing her face, I’m afraid mother is currently anxiously waiting for Su Nuan Nuan to come home.”
[Gumihou: I have something to say. DO NOT USE GOAT MEAT in Buddha Jumps over the Wall. Nuan Nuan you LIAR, no wait. White Pear Flower, you LIAR! I ruined 3 days worth of work and 30 over ingredients because of the lamb meat that I put into my jar of Buddha Jumps over the Wall. Wuwuwuwu…]
Anyway, I’m just going to sooth my eyes with this artfully assembled ingredients for Buddha Jumps over the Wall
Anyway, I’m planning to make the Buddha Jumps over the Wall again, and will report the result~ The recipe I plan to follow are a combination of these treasures
Chef claims that this is the ‘authentic’ way of making Buddha Jumps over the Wall, but I lack the necessary charcoal stove for it. But, one day. Yes, one day.
Liziqi also has a very straightforward recipe for Buddha Jumps over the Wall. If nothing else, her videos are quite enchanting
There’s also a homestyle version with English subtitles
I plan to follow Nuan Nuan’s style of serving the soup ingredients up as part of the dish and reduce the cooking time instead of squeezing every single drop of goodness out of the fresh meat as broth base for the expansive ingredients.
I wonder if I should put pig intestines? Is that too cheap or too common? I’ll have you know intestines are pretty expensive, ah!
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Translated by Gumihou from kitchennovel dot com.
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