Chapter 27: Can Eat, Can’t Cook
No one could have guessed that QQ Platform’s vice president Li Cheng Gong would have personally came out to announce Ye Fei’s results. This was something that was really unimaginable.
Quite a few of those who had worked in this company for two or three years could count in one hand the number of times they have caught a glimpse of the company higher ups. For Vice President Li to appear today, and not for the company’s ace sections, Song & Dance and Languages, but for that two day old noob, Iron Star Level 1 broadcaster Ye Fei.
Just what is going on?
Everyone knew, in their heart of hearts that this clearly meant that the top managements have begun to pay attention to this newcomer, which meant that this Ye Fei was likely to gain the full backing of the company’s strength and stand out as QQ Platform’s True Deity.
In that instant, the entire herd of noisy company staff was silent. The Song & Dance and Languages sections who had been singing a chorus together just now were now voiceless. Somehow, they all seemed to slowly melt away from sight as well.
Backstage of Fine Food Section.
Liu Ping and the rest never thought that Vice President Li would personally come to give this news. It’s just simply unimaginable. Right now, this bunch of people were so excited that any word or movement would set them off once more.
“Haha, with Vice President Li giving the news, let’s see if they dare to doubt us.”
“Vice President Li is such a wonderful guy, ah. Just when we want to slap their faces, Vice President Li presented us with a nice big plank.”
“This face slapping, I can still hear the papapa. I have a feeling anyone who dared to diss our Fine Food Sections now have felt like their cheeks have been rubbed with chillies, should be painful, ba?”
“That’s right, that’s right, those guys are too much, who in the world never suffered before, ah. Just look at them, just because our section couldn’t win against them, they enjoy stepping on us. Just what kind of people are those, ah. If we don’t beat them to death, we’re kindness incarnate, ah.”
“But, to be honest. Ye Fei’s work this time was too powerful, to think that even the top management would actually be shaken into action.”
“Of course, if you think about it, for a two day old Iron Star Level 1 newbie to gain a total of HX$23,000 reward on the first day, beating records of the few deities we have in our section was already pretty amazing. Today was even more excessive, the rewards collected were ten times higher than before. It would be weird if the top management didn’t make a move after that performance.”
“Over HX$230,000 reward, ah. Right now, I still feel like I’m dreaming, still can’t quite believe it.”
“Haha, you aren’t dreaming. Our section finally made it. No, I should say Ye Fei did it, he helped us vent this resentment in the most beautiful way possible. That guy us just… too adorable.”
The Fine Food Section were full of energy. It was like all of them had been given a shot of chicken blood as they enthusiastically chat about Ye Fei.
In contrast to the Fine Food Section, staff members from other sections were so pale that they might as well be green. Especially, within the Song & Dance and Languages department, where silence reigned supreme.
Not even in their wildest dreams (nightmare), could have imagined that the cold, almost forgotten section would have the ability to throw such a powerful bomb at them, exploding the competitors right out of the water.
“Ye Fei… just what motherf***ing guy is he? How could things turned out this way?” one of the Song & Dance statistician said bitterly.
“Who the hell knows where that creep pop out from. Over HX$200,000 reward? Just what kind of international level joke is this? Even our Silver Star, Level 1 deity would have trouble achieving this kind of of result.”
“This bastard, why didn’t he come to our Song & Dance Section?”
“What stupid thing are you saying, what is he going to do at our Song & Dance Department? Promote delicious food? Just like what he did?”
“Aiya, we could only say that Fine Food Section stepped on a piece of dog crap, a super powered, super reinforced, radioactive dog crap. This kind of luck was just too stupid to comprehend.”
“If Harmonious Music knows about this, I don’t see how he could be anything other than depressed. HX$100,000 rewards, ah. And here we thought he’d be Number 1. To be stomped on by Ye Fei into the dirt… the difference is just too amazing, the one in heaven stepping the one on earth, ah.”
At this time, the Languages Section office.
“Ye Fei? What kind of motherf***er is that, ah? How is he so powerful?”
“HX$200,000 rewards, ah. Just what kind of concept is this? If our Great Deity, Silver Star Extravagant Speeches, wanted to achieve this kind of target, he would have to dig deep into his box of tricks to pull off this kind of result.”
“For a Silver Star Level 1 noob broadcaster to crush a Silver Star senior. The f**k, haha, I still feel like I’m dreaming.”
“Just what did he do?”
“No rush, the video would soon be out. We’ll all know soon enough.”
As for the other departments, well, a morgue would probably be more lively. This was especially so for Outdoor Sports.
After a long silence, one of the statistician voiced out, “To… today, it looks like our section is number 1 from the bottom.”
“This is such a hurtful piece of news, ah.”
“That Fine Food Section, who would have thought, ah. That giant piece of salted fish would actually come back to life and overtake our department.”
“You’re wrong, they did not merely overtake us, they’ve flown over the heads of other sections as well. Even the Song & Dance and Languages Sections were stepped on by them.”
“HX$230,000, ah. Just how many people did that bastard have in his broadcasting room, ah?”
“Unclear, we’ll have to ask our colleague from the FF Section.”
“What’s there to ask? Will asking change the result? We’ll know once the video is out, f*** your grandma, this sucks.”
All the departments within the QQ Broadcasting Platform, aside from the FF Section of course, did not know what to say at all. One after another, they lowered their heads, the corpse of their broken pride heavy around their necks.
As the news spread beyond QQ Broadcasting staffs, quite a few broadcasters also gotten wind of this incredible news.
“What? HX$230,000? Are you guys f***ing with me? If he really hit HX$230,000, this senior will eat another super pizza!”
Iron Stomach’s was about to explode, even if they beat him to death there was no way he’d believe that Ye Fei noob would actually be able to reach HX$230,000 reward. That amount was a whole f***ing three times the amount of his own reward, you know. He’d almost eaten himself to death over that single super pizza, even now his gut was sticking out almost obscenely.
“Old Iron, please calm down, this is not fake news. I’ve confirmed it with one of the staffs. It looked like this news was given out by Vice President Li, so it has to be true.” Little Greedy Cat did her best to calm Iron Stomach down.
“How can I calm down, ah. Little Greedy Cat, you know my broadcasting tactics best. That super pizza is about 1.05 meter wide, ba? It should be about 8 catty (4.8 kg), ba? I, Old Iron, have eaten the entire thing in front of witnesses, so how? How had that noob broadcaster win against me? Just what kind of person, is he?” Iron Stomach practically leapt up from his chair, it made no sense, nothing made sense.
Little Greedy Cat sent up a bitter smile emoji, “Old Iron, actually, we’ve gotten it all wrong. When we first started off as broadcasters, we entered realizing that this was the worst performing platform in QQ Broadcasting, and assumed that anyone who would come and watch us perform were all poor people. However, only now did I understand that those who love eating could not possibly be poor. They are people with money, with enough money to experience food as an enjoyment instead of necessity. The reason why they haven’t showered us with money is because we did not manage to touch their sensitive point, looks like we’ll have to change our broadcasting ways, too.”
Iron Stomach laughed bitterly, “How to change? Our broadcasting ways have always been eating, eating deliciously, eating heartily, eating to the point of death. The essence of Fine Food has always been eating, otherwise how could we call it the Fine Food Section?”
“Eating is certainly important, however it looks like the audience are interested in things beyond seeing food disappear in front of them. They wanted to see the creation of food. Ye Fei managed to fill this gap, because he managed exploit this lack that he became successful.” Little Greedy Cat explained all this patiently.
Iron Stomach sat down on his chair. After a long while, he revealed some crucial news, “I can only f***ing eat, can’t cook, ah!”
Little Greedy Cat, “… I am the same.”
 Li Cheng Gong – his name is really wonderful, the direct translation is Successful Li!
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Translated and edited by Gumihou from kitchennovel dot com.
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